Since I’ve been working on starting a cottage bakery 99% of my research and recipe development has been focused there instead of on posting. I’ve gone through all of my cookbooks including some older magazines which is how I ended up reading the 1980 Wilton Yearbook. I’ve had it since 2009 when I used the flower techniques at the back to make a wedding cake for my aunt and her wife, but this is the first time I’ve looked through the whole magazine and just…wow. The 80’s were a wild time in cake decorating and I want to share some of my thoughts on what was going on at Wilton in 1980 for your entertainment. I give you a review and analysis of the 1980 Wilton Yearbook cakes.

Teen Birthdays

“All Grown Up: From finger paints and crayons to make-up and high heels! Remind her that childhood days and becoming a young lady are not that day apart.”

What a time to be a woman. Your childhood is officially over, here’s your make up and your heels. Remember if a boy is mean to you it means he likes you.

“Teen Turn-On”

Is it just me or should adults never ever ever ever use the phrase “teen turn-on”? Did turn on literally only refer to lightbulbs in the 80’s? Because this cake makes me very uncomfortable.

Adult Birthdays

“Jolly Jogger: Tell your favorite exercise nut that he’s extra special. And here’s the cake that’ll do it. It tells him you love him no matter how long it takes him to run around the block!”

I love this cake. First of all it seems to be based on the premise that someone only exercises to lose weight, which I know a lot of people do but if you’re making a cake about someone’s love for exercise they probably aren’t doing it just to lose weight. And if they are a cake kind of defeats the purpose of their exercise. Then the summary implies that they’re bad at running. Finally this cake lets everyone at the party know that the “jolly jogger” is trying to lose weight and also tells them their exact weight. This is the most passive aggressive cake I’ve ever seen in my life.

“‘U’ Turn Me On: Let him know he’s the one that turns you on with this clever birthday cake. It’ll turn you on too, as it’s easy to decorate!”

Wow. Wow there’s a lot to unpack here. Let’s start with the use of the word “clever.” Is this? Is this what we would call clever? Now personally I feel that discussions of sexual attraction should be more private than on a birthday cake, unless you’re going for a very specific vibe. And I can’t imagine that people were more comfortable expressing their sexual desires in cake form in 1980 than in 2023. But let’s also not ignore the statement “It’ll turn you on too, as it’s easy to decorate!” Ah yes, some women like 50 Shades of Grey, some women like book 2 of A Court of Thorns and Roses, and some women like an easy to decorate cake. No kink shaming here.

Graduation

“Eager Beaver: Make this cake for the go-getter graduate. Any eager beaver will get a chuckle out of this clever graduation cake.”

I will actually give Wilton credit for being clever here, because turning a bowling pin pan into a beaver is pretty clever. Although why someone would have a bowling pin pan I don’t know. I’m just hoping that in 1980 “eager beaver” was actually a compliment because I’m pretty sure that this is an insult now…

Sports

“Olympic Swimmers: With everyone so excited about the Summer Olympics here’s a cake that’;; make a big splash! And, it decorates in record time right in the pan.”

Ah yes the 1980 Summer Olympics. What a great time, everyone was so excited…except…the US didn’t participate in the 1980 Summer Olympics. The 1980 Summer Olympics in Moscow took place less than a year after the Soviet invasion of Afghanistan and the United States, along with 66 other countries, boycotted. And the boycott was announced at the end of 1979 so this must have just squeaked past the editors at Wilton because I can tell you no one in the US was excited about the 1980 Summer Olympics. It was not a splashing victory.

Cheer Up Cakes

“Lion’s Den: Being stuck in a hospital bed can become quite a bore–but not anymore! Make a cozy lion’s den cake to cheer up everyone in the hospital ward.”

What kind of bullying cake is this? “What? Still lyin’ around?” Because people in the hospital love the implication that they’re there by choice, you know just being lazy and lying around. You need to know someone really really well to make this cake for them in the hospital.

I hope you’ve enjoyed this exploration of the 1980 Wilton Yearbook as much as I have. I am now obsessed with these and will be trying to find even more outdated ones because I think they’re hilarious. But also the instructions on different buttercream flowers and piping techniques in the back are super helpful.